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Student Profile

Jessica

Class: Senior
Major: Other
Gender: F

High School:
Transfer Student: N

Big Picture

The best thing at JHU is that the misfits have a strong community. Those who enjoy docenting at museums, book clubs and vegan food feel persecuted by the polo-wearing majority and by the lack of school funding or support for artistic endeavors. They bond together over that. I would make tuition lower!!! I would also ask for themed housing, like they have at Loyola down the street: German language house, athlete housing, etc. I like the size of the school. I like a small pond. But other people say that it's too small; everyone you hook up with has hooked up with one of your friends...ew. "Are you a doctor?" No. I used to hold court at the Levering coffee shop. People always knew I would be there and would come to find me. But then one of my enemies started showing up there so I relocated. I used to love the Hutzler Reading Room (the Hut) in Gilman Hall, but they are renovating and took out all the books. Now it is just drafty, extremely hot/cold, and there is only one toilet for all 40 people studying in there. I LOVE BALTIMORE SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE. It is a great place to be young and strange. Did I mention our bike collective? The strange way that Mount Vernon (monuments, gay people) becomes North Central Arts District (train station, more gentrification) becomes African-hair-braiding/Korean-barbeque becomes Charles Village (lesbian dog walkers and Hopkins) becomes Waverly (Kennedy Fried Chicken, dollar stores, black people) becomes Roland Park (rich rich rich) becomes Hampden (poor white people, awesome shopping and lame touristy shopping)? I love it. The administration is kind of a ***. It took us a year and a half to get funding for our club. But some of the deans are lovely. Hmm...Sig Chi's racist Halloween party...the Carrolton Review published pictures of DSAGA and "outed" them...people are frequently dying... There is mild school pride. A lot of people seem to take pride in saying: "JHU: Where your best hasn't been good enough since 1896" but half the schools in the country claim that motto as their own. People have a lot of pride in how unwashed, awkward, throaty and boring their classmates are. Also we have a lacrosse team. Baltimore is unusual. Dance parties in Gilman 500 (under the belltower). The scent of night-blooming magnolia by the library. The first time I went to a warehouse party... People complain about everything.

Academic Life

Yes, every single one of my professors has known my name. I love almost all of my classes. That is because I take mostly Writing and English classes. Right now I am obsessed with this tiny 3-person seminar. I love every single one of my writing workshop classes; my teachers are so wise. Yes, it is pretty commong. I only try to be friends with people who can, on occasion, have intellectual conversations. Not all the time, (because frequently we talk about food, or sex, or complain) but lots of times when we're drunk we discuss Deleuze, Abstract Expressionism and Henry James. Also the scientists love to battle the Near Eastern Studies kids. Some are, yes. When it's LSAT time, I want to hide, and avoid all future lawyers like the plague. But it's bad form among more normal people to EVER discuss GPAs and to some degree board scores. I love the Writing Seminars department. My teachers are AMAZING critics of my work and everyone else's work. Dave Smith has a Pulitzer, Alice McDermott is superfamous, Jessica Anya Blau is getting her first rave-review novel out this May...they are so fantastic. My classmates are mostly dumb. There are about 3-4 good writers per year. The 100 other people are just blobbing around, trying to "express" themselves and write about New York, teen pregnancy scares, and successful media personalities going through complicated divorces. Um, yes. I used to spend too much time with them, to the point that I spend time more reliably with professors whose classes I wasn't even taking than with my "friends." We have coffee, that's pretty much it. I really like them. No core, take some science classes, some b.s. social science classes, then the rest as you please. JHU seems to think that after graduation, Arts& Sciences kids are only capable of becoming a) Consultants b) Finance workers. There is, like, one class geared to either of these occupations. No one ever says, "You'll need to know this for a job" in class (well, except in really practical classes, like Social Statistics or Computer Fluency). I want to become a social worker and the school has nooooooo resources for that. I don't blame them, though. With writers especially, learning is for its own sake.

Student Body

Some self-segregating goes on. The black community is really tight, and they have lots of student groups, activities, and faculty mentors to promote friendships and support. But I think a lot of not-black people think the black kids are a bit off by themselves. Also, kids who speak Korean or Chinese at home sometimes stick to themselves. Many gays bemoan the gay scene. DSAGA is mad incestuous so those not lucky enough to find luv on campus look to the real world (there is many a gay bar in Mount Vernon, many a lesbian at the farmer's market). Not a lot of poor kids. A few really rich kids. Quite a disturbing number of really spoiled kids, not matter what their parents earn. Kids who are paying for their own education, no matter what their parents earn. Can't think of who's out of place...maybe a fashion model. I look around the room and EVERYONE IS WEARING BLUE JEANS UGH GAG ME. Jeans and tee shirts, polos, pea coats rule. However, there's always someone wearing a suit. There is always a boy with braids, a girl wearing loud tights, someone who buys all her clothes in Free P Star in the Marais in Paris...and these people are generally admired, and talked about in a reverent way. Four tables! Dining Hall! Freshman! That means they are loud, pimply, and are throwing food at each other while trying to flirt. They are all eating fro-yo. They are Jewish. The Jewish kids are making fun of the Chinese kids for going to tennis camp. The Indian kid laughs awkwardly. The sole white Catholic girl is whining about missing her cat, who lives in New Jersey. A boy from Wisconsin uses an ethnic slur. Everyone has a nickname denoting their state of origin, religion or ethnicity. They are from Maryland, New Jersey, and California. Lots of East Coasters. Upper middle class, whatever the hell that means. No one cares about anything. There are about five people who have an active orientation, and they are mixed. Yes, all the damn time. Half think they'll be poor, half think they'll be rich.